Reflections on homecoming: Navigating Highs and Lows
During my recent journey back to my homeland, I underwent a whirlwind of emotions, ranging from soaring highs to crushing lows. It was a stark reminder that despite our illusions of control, life remains unpredictable, with only the unwavering support of our immediate family serving as a constant anchor during turbulent times. They are the ones who consistently stand by our side, offering love, support, and happiness unconditionally.
My brother and I arrived brimming with anticipation and delight for our cousin's grand wedding, knowing that the week ahead would be filled with festivities, reunions, and traditional rituals. Our social batteries were fully charged, ready to dive into the whirlwind of events. Witnessing our cousin tie the knot filled us with immense pride and joy, momentarily bridging the gap that time and distance had created between us. It was a moment of pure, unfiltered bliss.
However, being away from home, particularly with children pursuing education or careers abroad, often invites misconceptions and judgments from society regarding one's lifestyle and responsibilities. People in the East always view this as a step up in lifestyle, equating that to freedom of doing whatever you please without any duty or obligation. In our case, it comes across as 'Abh tho you are Canadians', but this very interpretation of how people view us is entirely wrong, at the very least for us. Its difficult for them to fathom and understand the type of life we had to cave out and build for ourselves from scratch. The West or foreign lands are indeed portrayed as developed lands with opportunity; however, to get to even touching that pot of value, you need to work your way while managing every other aspect of your living. Personally, I've endured years of hardship, working menial jobs to support my education and basic needs, with little left for myself since I won't want to add any pressure on my parents to help me financially, leaving me with 1$ in my bank. So when people think we have it easy, it feels almost derogatory and hurtful, while it is no fault of their own since one has to walk a mile in our shoes to understand the difference. Since we can interpret and comprehend both sides, it is easier for us to let go and move on. While this was not the low for me, it was the region between the crest and trough for emotion.
But what's important to realize for everyone, and perhaps this just gets lost in the noise, is that everyone is running their own race, each with its unique challenges and obstacles. Comparing and ranking these struggles is not only unjust but also futile. Whether someone faces hurdles barefoot on a clear path or navigates obstacles with the best equipment available, their journey is inherently difficult and worthy of respect.
Unexpectedly, amidst the celebration, tragedy struck with the loss of a loved one. This news had a heavier impact on the family, closer to the hearts and souls that members had a lasting effect on, but the feeling and sensing loss of life coupled with seeing how my own grandparent's health has deteriorated and witnessing them turn from people who felt invincible and independent into dependent people who are now taken care of through all family members collectively has had a complete gravitational shift for me. In the hustle and bustle of life, I tend to lose sight of how delicate life is. It's one of those gifts people sadly tend to realize when it's gone. I had a moment of profound reflection during a prayer gathering at the temple (I still can't get over this). As I observed my close relatives overcome with grief and tears during the prayer meeting, I couldn't shake the weight of the emotions in the air. Suddenly, a person across from me rose and left, and right behind the chair where they were sitting was a familiar idol of a goddess that held a special significance from my upbringing. Despite being an inanimate carving, it felt as though their eyes were fixed upon mine, urging me to pause and reflect on the profoundness of the moment. It was as if she was silently asking me to stop, take a moment, and contemplate the deeper meaning behind the shared sorrow and the transient nature of life.
Each of us is crafting our own narrative, where the ink of our pen may falter or halt unexpectedly, creating unfilled gaps. Yet, the manner in which we choose to script our story remains firmly within our grasp. It's up to us to wield our control, shaping the twists and turns, the highs and lows, and drawing lessons from our past to steer the course towards a brighter tomorrow.
